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[ice_69]

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Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

trauma is having your first vision being seeing the corpse of that person's best friend being puppeted around by some cursed sorcerer brain thing and knowing that happened because of that person--you, essentially, perspective-wise

[bit of a pause...]

...
I knew Shura a little before the boat but he always aggravated me 'cause he was never honest and never genuine and then on the boat, I got to see some of what that actually looks like on him
and then I got that vision and freaked the fuck out because y'know DUDE'S DOUBLE'S IN MY VISION!
so went to him about it, but y'know, still freaking the fuck out said we should avoid repeats of that and just do things differently
except that was apparently doing the exact same thing because even though I said I didn't want to do these visions shit alone and didn't want HIM to or feel pressured to keep going
surprise!
we both continued on our own!
except he probably started way earlier
even when I kept trying to reach out
didn't matter 'cause what I said at the VERY start
so whatever happens, it's on me
feel free to tell him I said as much
or that Satoru sends his regards.

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

I'm not going to use your true name that would be messed up
but I'll tell him the rest
even though based on what you're saying I really don't think it's just on you

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

why would it be messed up?
he used it several times at the date.

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

if someone kept saying my true name at me or behind my back I would be freaking out

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

yeah i'm literally giving you permission to, though
so it's not behind my back
and, if anything, you'll get a reaction probably

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

fine I'll say it if you really want me to

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

if you really don't wanna, don't gotta
if anything
sorry
my bad
forgot to tell you that the person in my visions
is absolutely 100% insane out the membrane
and kinda feels like I'm ready to go over the edge to meet him there
and kinda feels like that's what's wanted, too

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

yeah he's pretty scary
I saw him in a dream once

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

what'd he do that was scary?

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

he threatened to kill me
and acted creepy in general

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

huh
weirdo
I'd say I don't think he would kill someone just 'cause
but
yeah dunno

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

it felt like he was really going to
but who knows, it was a dream

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

I mean... COULD kill you isn't the same as WILL kill you
but fair
anyway
my bad if i woke ya up
but also
screaming into the void got old fast

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

it's ok I wasn't asleep
and I'd rather think about other people's problems than my own

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

rather not have problems!
these problems suck!

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

understandable! if i could make the problems disappear I would but
obviously I can't
sorry I'm not very good at helping with anything

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

you're helping
that guy's a fucking idiot who keeps convincing himself he's gotta do everything on his own
and probably feeling both proud of himself and miserable with himself that no one's caught on yet
so me ratting him out to you kneecaps him there
and he needs that
so that's helping both me and him

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

ok
I'll talk to him first thing in the morning

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

(b˙◁˙ )b

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

🙂

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

ok now your turn

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

what?

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

why does it feel like I'm the only one ever saying and doing things and other people give me the run around?
do I just suck to talk to?

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[ice_69]

I'm sorry
I like talking to you I promise
I'm just not sure what you want me to say or do
sorry

Re: EXTREME LATE NIGHT Day 244

[unlimitedtimeoff]

it's not about what I want
it's about what you feel comfortable talking with me about
I'm not gonna say NOW YOU HAVE TO SHARE, OR ELSE!
because I lowkey a little sick of feeling like I'm forcing people's hands
but like
why am I opening myself up to more hurt if it's not something the other person does in kind?
that's why I stabbed myself in the first place
hurt less than what was going on